We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
