I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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