LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Randomize
