i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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