i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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