We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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