i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize
