You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize