If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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