Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
