Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize