I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
The feeling are messing with the penis
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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