Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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