She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
