i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
