Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
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