Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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