also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
