All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I am midnight drunk by noon
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
