I like my sex mixed with concussions.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
