what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize
