Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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