Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
