Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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