I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Randomize
