I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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