I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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