I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize