I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize