Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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