Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
