You surviving the open bar?
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I feel great
I just peed on a car
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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