Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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