Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
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