i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
