Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Randomize
