we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
