watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
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