I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
