He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
