week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
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