I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
