Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
