It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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