i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
i think my cat just said my name.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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