fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
