pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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