so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Randomize
