This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
