Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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