But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
